A Night At The Movies

This post is for the guys…because I know what you’re thinking. Natalie Portman, she’s a good looking chick. And I need to get out of the dog house for inviting the boys over last weekend and leaving wings and half-empty beers between the sofa cushions. And hey, ballet is not my thing, but how much of the movie could really be actual ballet dancing. Yeah, why not, I’ll go see Black Swan.

And that is where I step in my friends. Consider it a Christmas present to you or just my good deed for the week. My advice to you- DO NOT DO IT. That is presumptuous, though, because what I look for in a movie may not be what floats your boat. As the theme song for the classic sitcom stated so eloquently, it takes different strokes to move the world yes it does. For example, just because I don’t prefer camerawork that is akin to 1980s home video footage of a child’s birthday party and that is so shaky and zoomed in that it merits nausea medication doesn’t mean others feel the same. And my feelings about watching a girl pick off her skin to the point of significant bloodshed 10 to 15 times in a two-hour period (not a big fan) may not be yours at all. But make no mistake, you are signing up for ballet. I mean, a lot of ballet. And visions of a dude in giant black feathery outfits using his position of power for sexual gain.

I won’t give away too much of the movie in case you are of a mind to see it. Just prepare yourself for a mixture of ballet and disturbing images…and not much else. I came out of it feeling like Ace Ventura immediately after realizing that Einhorn was a man, but maybe it’s just me. At least the night wasn't a total loss. On the way out of the theater I caught a glimpse of a larger than life cutout of Justin Bieber alerting me to his soon-to-be-released 3D movie, Never Say Never.

In two months these sweet red boots will look like they are coming right at your grill.