Julia Roberts Rears Her Head Yet Again

It wasn't supposed to be this way. Damn you, Julia Roberts, I will not let you take over my blog! That said, I must revisit your wretchedness one last time. After the excellent guest post by Murls and my follow up, I thought we had left Julia Roberts in our collective rear view mirror. And then, unfortunately, my wife asked me last night if I had heard about her recent conversion to Hinduism. "Uhhh, no, and for God's sake can we keep it that way?" was my response. Unfortunately we could not, and soon enough I was reading an article discussing Julia's conversion.

The gist of it is this- Julia Roberts, while filming Eat, Pray, Love, converted to Hinduism. As a result, a priest renamed her three children Laxmi, Ganesh, and Krishna Balram. I'm no expert on Hinduism, and in all seriousness I understand that Krishna Balram is quite probably a highly respected name in that faith. But can I just say that a decade or so from now, when paparazzi cameras are following an adolescent Krishna Balram into crystal meth houses, and Julia and her godforsaken husband are trying to figure out where it all went wrong, this might be a good place to start? Were you to continue reading the discussion with Julia, which apparently is part of an upcoming story in Elle magazine, you would also learn that she also now believes in reincarnation. The oh-so-deep-thinker Julia says that after her hectic and stressful current celebrity life, she hopes to be reincarnated as "something quiet". I have no doubt that you will be, Julia. The Hindu gods have already blessed you with the mouth of a catfish in this life, and I can think of no quieter animal than that.

Someday in the future an innocent catfish will be paying for your sins of today, Julia.